It's a black and white photo of a casually good looking and carelessly wealthy couple sitting in the living room of a fantastic NYC apartment. The ad reads,
" Buying a home is a precious commitment - a life decision - and a matter of the heart. At Corcoran we make it our business to know what's in yours- and then to find homes that make your heart beat a faster. We work to understand who you are and how a home defines that and we help you weigh your options. perhaps balance your passion with a little objective logic. It's the best way to help you find a home- and make a decision you can be deeply happy with the rest of your life."
Good ad copy is always worth admiring. Even for those of you quasi-commies out there who despise the accumulation of wealth and the endless wellspring of social inequity that springs from the pursuit of said accumulation. After looking at that ad, don't you want to be "in contract?"
Maybe not. Maybe the thought of real estate has the same effect on you as Ambien. But the message is universal. Live who you are. Who knew that the masters of marketing of something as soulless as a massive New York City real estate firm would have provided the key to happiness in one of their ads.
Live who you are.
Like all the other keys to happiness; living who you are is atrociously simple yet painfully out of reach for most people. Why are they unhappy? Because they aren't living who they are. Why not? That problem is two fold. For the most part people have only a very vague notion about who they are and the ones that do know who they are usually try their hardest to not live that way.
With the exception of you double jointed circus folk out there, our fingers naturally bend in one direction. If you force them in the other direction it hurts, and if you force it hard enough the damn things just break leaving you in all sorts of agony. The same goes for living who you are.
Who are you?
At the very end of the day, in the moments before you fall asleep, when all the masks come off, on that tenuous bridge between active cognition and unconscious oblivion, who are you? I can assure you that whoever that person is, its definitely not the same person as the one who wakes up in the morning and begins a long chain of compromises between their own wants and needs while navigating the chaotic demands of the wants and needs of everyone they cross paths with.
Who are you?
A worker. A grinder. A gambler. A free spirit. A fighter. A writer. A jerk. A romantic. A bum. A lost soul. A cog. A drunk. A cheater. A liar. A lawyer. A salesman. A loser. A winner. A cheap bastard. A regular bastard. A poser. A douche. A baller. A teacher. A student. Ashamed. Amazed. A believer. A pillar. A fault. A weakness. A manipulator. Afraid. Alone. Awaiting.
Whatever you are, how often are you aware of who you are? Most of us are only aware of who we want to be and who we think we are. Well then how do you know who you really are?
What do you value and what are your values?
If you can identify your core values, the tenets of your being upon which there can be no compromise, no ambivalence, no confusion, no mutability and no negotiation then you have found your values. In this day and age there are more and more of us who are unable to identify those values even though we all have them on some level.
My core value?
Freedom.
The freedom to say and do what I want when I want is the one principle for which I will forsake all others. Love, morality, efficiency, logic, finance, family all take a backseat to freedom. This life, these thoughts, these fleeting moments of coherence are mine and I will use them as I please for as long as I can. Freedom always has and always will be the goal.
Financial freedom, spiritual freedom, emotional freedom, intellectual freedom. All of it. I want every last bit.
That is who I am. An unabashed unapologetic unrestrained pursuit of freedom.
Unfortunately I have not always lived my life in harmony with my core value. The result: anger, depression, frustration and stagnation. I know who I am and every time I try to be someone else, I suffer.
What do you value?
Security? Acceptance? Empathy? Achievement? Absolution? Recognition? Fear? Validation? Pride? Beauty? Truth? Wisdom?
Once you identify that core then everything else will become clear. Once your choices are aligned with your values then life's obstacles begin to crumble and the truer your alignment, the faster the crumbling. Eventually everything that is blocking your way will be swept aside like a handful of sand thrown into the ocean.
If that's the case then why on earth would anyone not want to live who they are? Sometimes we try to live who others want us to be or who we believe we should be or who we think that we want to be. Unfortunately you can only be happy when you are who you are. If you're still confused then I suggest you put a fish in the air and a bird in the water and maybe it'll become clearer.
As this year recedes into history and in between making elaborate plans for New Year's Eve take a little time to examine who exactly it is that you are. As we begin 2010 just remember one thing:
Live who you are!
Note to Corcoran broker: referral fees are always appreciated and will go directly towards my personal live who you are fund.
Who doesn't like floor to ceiling windows?
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